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Joke of the Day

"rural upbringin' What do you call a bunch of tractors parked in front of a McDonald's on Friday night in Wisconsin? Prom night."

"I've been doing so much cardio that I'm going to have a heart attack And my hearts gonna win."

"What do you use to search for anime in Google? Weabooleans"

"Why does a moon rock taste better than an earth rock? Because it's a little meteor."

"9/11 gave rise to ""Truthers"", Obama gave rise to ""Birthers"", so... ... would a movement to determine whether Hillary Clinton actually carries hot sauce in her purse be called ""Saucers""?"

"Q: What does a cat say when he likes something? A: It's purrrfect."

"What's the difference between a watermelon and a baby? One is fun to smash, the other is delicious."

"Yo mama so poor she was in K-Mart with a box of Hefty bags. I said, ""What ya doin'?"" She said, ""Buying luggage."""

"I like my girls like I like my coffee... Fresh, not matured, and sold from a shady part of South America."

"SOLDIER: Yankee Oscar Uniform Romeo Foxtrot Lima Yankee India Sierra Delta Oscar Whiskey November CAPTAIN: Lima Oscar Lima!"