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Joke of the Day

"How much do deer nuts cost? Under a buck"

"Why is French body armour so cheap? They only need it for their back"

"God Said to Phil ""Come Forth and Receive Eternal Life."" Phil came fifth and received a toaster."

"When someone asks me how my day is, I like to say ""Still kinda pissed about Hiroshima,"" & then start swearing in Japanese."

"How do you know when a black woman is pregnant? When you pull out her tampon and all the cotton is picked."

"Just got fired from my job at the chip shop for sticking my dick in the potato peeler And she got fired too!"

"Why do mermaids put their things on top of clams? Because clams are shelf-ish."

"Your mama's so stupid She killed herself for life insurance"

"Why did the chicken cross the road? TO MAKE A VERY BIG POO POO!!!"

"My Girlfriend used to go down on me all the time... ...so I fixed the puncture"