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Joke of the Day

"A corgi walks into a bar Bartender: what can I ge... Corgi: I'll have a jack and coke Bartender: why the short paws?"

"knock knock ""Who's there?"" ""KGB."" ""KGB wh--"" [slap recipient of the joke] ""Vee vill ask za questions!"""

"What do you call Whoopi Goldberg after sex? A Whoopi pie."

"*Aquarium GUIDE: Octopuses are sensitive to camera flash so please turn off...ma'am don't flash the octopus ME: [pulls shirt back down] ok"

"What do these owners think when choosing music for their stores restroom? ""oh yeah people like to listen to this when they're taking a shit"""

"Whenever u feel like ur not being productive, take a nap. You'll wake up groggy & angry & have forgotten abt the whole ""productivity"" thing"

"Q: What do you call a fish with no eyes? A: Fsh."

"I asked Yoda for a two word review of Les Miserables ""Lame is."""

"Mark Twain Quote ""Politicians and diapers must be changed often, and for the same reason."""

"Just heard about this teacher who had sex with her student. Another reason I won't send MY dog to obedience school"