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Joke of the Day

"What do these owners think when choosing music for their stores restroom? ""oh yeah people like to listen to this when they're taking a shit"""

"How does every racist joke start? *Looks around the immediate area*"

"How many men does it take to screw in a light bulb? None. Let the bitch cook in the dark!!!"

"What kind of snake is good at building things? A boa constructor."

"What do you get when you put the entire South Carolina cheerleading team in one room? A full set of teeth."

"I hope Death is a woman That way it will never come for me"

"Scientist next to me: My god. Reality is a simulation. Me (also a scientist): My god. I haven't fed my tamagotchi in 17 years."

"A mean mathematician is just an average guy."

"I'm getting a vanity plate that reads ""B Pitt"" because I like people to be disappointed when they look at me."

"How do you tell the difference between a chemist and a plumber? Ask them to say the word, ""unionized""."