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Joke of the Day

"I had this one night stand, and the next morning I felt so guilty I bought another one for the other side of the bed."

"Why do polish people all have ski at the end of their name? Because they can't spell toboggan."

"If I had a dollar for every time I thought about you ..I'd start thinking about you."

"Due to the prostitute's arm injury, she can do no more than 5 handjobs a night. Damn handie-cap!"

"What did the little girl with no arms, no legs, blind, deaf and mute get for Christmas? NSFW Cancer"

"This is Gold Au"

"How does the executioner like his coffee? Decap"

"Why can't you trust atoms? Because they make up everything!"

"Q. What's brown and sticky? A. A stick!"

"I called the Paranoia Hotline: This guy answered and said, ""How the hell did you get this number?"""