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Joke of the Day

"When black guys say ""ya feel me?"", I literally feel them so they know exactly what level of white I'm operating at."

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"Ke$ha looks like a character I would select in Mortal Kombat"
"A joke my 4 year old came up with today... Him: ""What's the only mammal that can breathe under water?"" Me: ""I dunno, what?"" Him (loudly): ""An elephant sticking his trunk up!"""
"Criminal on the electric chair. The officer asks: Any last wishes? The criminal: Please hold my hand"
"What would The Beatles have been called if Ringo never joined? The Beatless"
"Why was the snowman's dog called Frost? Because Frost bites."
"Them: Pleasure to meet you. Me: Give it time."
"Cracked me up when I was 5, still cracks me up as an adult. Why do gorillas have such big nostrils? Because they have such big fingers!"
"How many tickles does it take to make an octopus laugh? Ten tickles ^I ^am ^so ^sorry"
"My friends ask me if I got A haircut I say ""no, I got them ALL cut!"""