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Joke of the Day
"The tachyon leaves. The Barman says ""We don't serve your kind here."" A tachyon enters a bar."
Next Joke
"In all the alternate universes, in how many is Kim Kardashian super famous and in how many did she just get fired from a Wells Fargo?"
"I keep a picture of a dragon fighting a helicopter in my wallet, in case the police ask to see my license for awesome."
"Hey something came in the mail today... What? Deez Nutz! Haha Got Em!"
"Instructions in the Men's Room for hand washing. Because non-hand washers can't be bothered unless there's an opportunity to learn stuff."
"What do you call it when a helicopter pilot reflects on his life? HINDsight"
"Who doesn't like lincoln logs john wilkes blocks"
"Boyfriend: you want to go see the new Star Wars? Me: I LOVE STAR WARS BF: which was your fav Me: duh, Sorcerer's Stone"
"You could probably win the US election by promising to make the McRib a permanent McDonald's menu item."
"A woman is like a parachute can refuse at any time, that's why you need to have a spare one."