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Joke of the Day

"Call me old fashioned but I prefer women with eyebrows made out of hair"

"What instrument did the famous dog use to sign his autographs? a Shar-Pei :)"

"How did Humpty Dumpty get ripped? Wall-sits."

"What is the difference between a black Jew and a white Jew? Black Jews have to sit at the back of the gas chamber."

"If it takes 150 yards of stewed tripe to make a pair of leather britches for a bull, how long does it take for a double breasted cockroach to climb a bar of soft soap? You tell me and we'll both know."

"What is Victoria's Secret? 'Her' real name is Victor!"

"What do you call it when Batman skips church? Christian bail."

"The doctor told me I should stop masturbating today. So I look him straight in the eye and asked him ""why?"". And then he said something about not being able to work in these conditions."

"5 years ago I asked a girl if she wanted to go on a date. Yesterday I asked her if she would marry me. She said no both times, though."

"The Iron Chef judge who said flavors ""explode"" in her mouth is so inconsiderate. Now I can't hear the show over my own adolescent giggling."