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Joke of the Day
"China has a great wall..... and guess what? No Mexicans!"
Next Joke
"Me: I hope you pee your pants, teach you not to hold it in! My daughter: You shouldn't wish for that..you're the one that does the laundry!"
"Mayweather goes 48-0 49-0 if you count his wife"
"Doctor, reaching for a piece of paper: ""Are you on any meds?"" Me: ""You might want to grab a notebook."""
"They say 1 in 3 men are gay. I'm not gay, he's not gay..."
"Every time I eat a banana in public, a stranger offers me money to do it in private. I ate 32 bananas today & made $725. I have diarrhea."
"*CRASH* *THUMP* *SCREAM* *Husband runs into bedroom* H: OHMYGOD ARE YOU OKAY? Me: Yeah. Just taking off my sports bra."
"A paedophile and a young boy are walking through a forest at midnight..... The young boy says, ""I'm scared"". The paedophile says, ""You're scared? I've got to walk back on my own!"""
"The last US election had a candidate called Mitt, a devout Catholic and a candidate called Newt, a serial adulterer. One was against same sex marriage and the other was against same marriage sex."
"I invented a new sex position called the JFK I splatter all over her while she feverishly tries to get out of the car."