52397

Joke of the Day

"German tourist crosses Polish border. Border guards ask him: -Name? -Hans -Surname? -Schmidt -Occupation? -No, just traveling."

"Dad i know I'm adopted Hi adopted, I'm not dad"

"How to comfort a homosexuals family if hes in a coma? You can always say ""well, look at it this way; he was a fruit, now hes a vegetable!"""

"Domestic violance in progress. When my wife starts to sing I always go out and do some garden work so our neighbors can see there's no domestic violence going on."

"If someone doesn't stand up to let you pass them in movie theater seats, it's totally cool and legal to fart in their face as you walk by."

"Q: How many IBM CPUs does it take to perform a logical right shift? A: 32. One to hold the bits and 31 to push the register."

"Broke up with my Japanese girlfriend today. I had to drop the bomb twice before she got a hint."

"Jamaica is demanding compensation from the UK for our involvement in the slave trade! Shocking, we already paid for them once!"

"Turns out those miniature liquor bottles aren't for babies and now my brother says I can't be the God Mother."

"What do you call Zombie Japanese Chefs? the Woking Dead"