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Joke of the Day

"Q: How many IBM CPUs does it take to perform a logical right shift? A: 32. One to hold the bits and 31 to push the register."

"(Possible nsfw)Adam was watching Eve.... Masturbate with a fish. God said, great now I'm never gonna get the smell out!"

"bloke in the pub The other night, this bloke in the pub was telling me he was a big star in the 80's with a song called ""stand and deliver"". I didn't believe a word he said, but he was adamant"

"I've not smoked weed in two year, during that time I've completed sooooo much ...................... drunk"

"Knock Knock Who's there ! Ben ! Ben who ? Ben knocking on this door all morning !"

"I used to go fishing with Skrillex... but he kept dropping the bass :("

"the year is 2048 twerking has become a sport the seas are now made of starbucks ugg boots are required by law"

"What goes clip-clop clip-clop bang!? An Amish drive-by shooting."

"How do you spell ""we"" with two letters without using the letters W and E? U and I."

"If someone is bothering you with unnecessary calls to your cell number, post their number on eBay with the ad ""iPhone 5S for $1 only"""