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Joke of the Day
"I love milk... It's got lots of cowcium."
Next Joke
"Cemeteries are some of the most popular clubs in the world... ...I mean, people are literally *dying* to get in."
"If there really was a Purge, and all crime was legal for one night, I'd probably do something super crazy, like loiter."
"I sometimes hump random trees in hopes one will ejaculate Keebler cookies."
"Im wearing my camouflaged underwear. They'll never see me cuming"
"I listen to your prayers, but only to correct their grammar."
"I walked in on my girlfriend cheating. I don't know what I ever saw in her... ..well, except for another dude's penis."
"Mum: How come your friend ______ hasn't been around lately? Me: Because he turned into a cunt."
"To make my guests comfortable, I always put a sign in the bathroom that says ""Don't worry, I cleaned, those are permanent stains."""
"How many hipsters dose it take to change a light bulb? A: None they have a guy for that comes on Tuesdays only uses reproductions of antique bulbs"