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Joke of the Day

"My kid started doing this annoying preteen whiny voice and now I can turn my head all the way around like the exorcist."

"I asked my boss... I asked my boss what he wanted me to do with a large roll of bubble wrap. He told me to pop it in the corner. It took me over three hours!"

"Chef Joke. What do you call a mummy that hates other peoples cooking? Gordan Ramses"

"a baby seal walks into a club.."

"Where do Amish people go to get medicine? To the farmacy."

"How are Oklahoma 3.2 beers like sex in a canoe? They're both fucking close to water."

"It's 27 outside. Oh great, even the weather is younger and cooler than me now."

"I wanted to take a grad level Psych class on Freud, in my sophomore year. But the professor wouldn't let me. She said I was too Jung"

"What's the loudest thing in the last two Harry Potter films? Deaf Lee's ""HELLO!"""

"How Do You Start An African Rave? staple toast to the ceiling..."