51131

Joke of the Day

"If women are people, why are they so stupid? Seriously. Even the smartest and most accomplished women are dumber than the most retarded head lice."

"You say lonely I say home alone with an opportunity to masturbate"

"What do you get if you cross a dead Israeli leader with a New Age diet nut? Menachem Vegan"

"""Do you want to be the numerator or the denominator tonight...? You're so radical!"" How I hit on my imaginary mathematician girlfriend"

"what do you call female-to-male sexual reassignment surgery? an addadicktomy"

"I've been trying to figure out why I overslept today. Just realized drunk me set my calculator for $7.30."

"I had an Irish 7 course meal A potato and a six pack"

"I Don't like racist jokes... ...because I don't appreciate black humour."

"My son just walked in crying, saying he was scared as Trump won. I said, fuck off, you're 22 & British. Oh yes he replied & went to work."

"""hello pretty lady."" [i slide down the bar] ""what's your name?"" i say as i casually toss a peanut in my eye."