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Joke of the Day

"This is a dark one! A black baby, pickle and a blender. what do you get? A Nickle!"

"Infants don't have nearly as much fun in infancy as adults have in adultery."

"What's ET short for? Because he's got little legs."

"[blind date] ""I'm like, really good at *looks on hand* making the sex"" -did you just read that off your hand? ""Hey! You're not blind!"""

"Everybody on earth has that one person that they wish they could wake up next to. Mine is a grilled cheese sandwich."

"Why do scuba divers jump off the boat backwards? Because if they jumped forwards they'd still be in the boat."

"Kim jong un is sick... Kim Jong Un is sick. I guess you could say he's now Kim Jong ill."

"Did you hear about the blind dog that never got lost? It really nose it's way around."

"The grown up version of Tetris is loading a full dishwasher."

"Why is it easy for light bulbs to travel? Because they pack light."