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Joke of the Day

"What I say: No! What my kids hear: There's a really good chance if you keep asking."

"Cole Wagner's new sports nickname is Jared Fogle. Because he just fucked nine twelve year-olds from Missouri"

"What does a suicidal person say while leaving a party? I want to hang by myself for a bit. Edit: Not suicidal. Just gallows humor."

"I basically have three hairstyles. 1. Straight 2. Wavy 3. Homeless"

"[meets a cute girl from Scotland] ""Ummm hi your people make fantastic tape"""

"If i was the Grinch, I wouldn't steal Christmas. I'd steal you."

"A lot of people tell me that I'm funny... So I guess it's a good thing that looks aren't everything"

"What type of dog suffers from being inbred? A hotdog"

"My ex owned a parakeet. The thing would never shut up. The bird was cool though."

"what did the gay bull say? more cowball!"