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Joke of the Day

"Hair is like fitness... If you don't condition, it'll suck (I'm sorry for nothing)"

"What's the difference between a corn farmer with epilepsy and a prostitute with dysentery? One shucks between fits and the other fucks between shits."

"Just because I don't talk to you, or text you first, doesn't mean I don't miss you. I'm just waiting for you to miss me."

"70% of my enemies were once my friends."

"Two peanuts were walking through the bush... One was assaulted."

"Apparently The Hulk's blind date went well. I asked him about it today and he just said ""Hulk Smash."""

"Procrastination is a dish best served tomorrow."

"What do you call a dog with two vaginas? Snatches"

"Why did Microsoft skip a number when naming their new operating system? Because 7 ate 9."

"Indian Chief My friend got an Indian Chief tattooed on his arm. His arm never worked again!"