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Joke of the Day

"The number one cause of depression in people over 30 is hearing co-workers resentfully sing, ""Happy Birthday"" just to get cake."

"What's the difference between David Blaine and the NRA? The former has a cunning array of stunts"

"What do you call someone pretending to nice to people just to get upvotes? karma chameleon"

"""Fiona, You up?"" -Shrext."

"Why did sumo wrestlers start shaving their legs? To stop getting confused as feminists"

"Personal space is a concept I did not understand in Kindergarten I guess that's why they fired me."

"Whats a similarity between planes and girls? they both have cockpits"

"I remember when my grand father first got his pace maker Every time he would go to use the microwave he would piss his pants and forget who he was for about an half an hour or so."

"I wonder if mirrors every get tired of having their picture taken."

"What do you do when your girlfriend starts smoking? Slow down and maybe use some lube"