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Joke of the Day

"What do you do when your girlfriend starts smoking? Slow down and maybe use some lube"

"A prospective army man walks into a recruitment office without pants. ""Is there a draft in here?"""

"Did you hear about the tree's birthday? It was a sappy one!"

"She blinded me with Science. Okay, it was pepper spray."

"I think that Stephen Hawking is a con man.... My sister is in a wheelchair and she's as thick as shit!"

"Vodka is just potatoes that made the right career choices."

"Depression starts in a part of the brain called the Hippocampus Which is strange because I always thought hippos loved studying."

"What did General Custer's advisors tell him before the Battle of Little Bighorn? Don't do it, it's Siouxicide"

"I asked my friend from North Korea how it was to live there. He said he couldn't complain."

"Hillary Clinton and Donald Trump get into a car accident. Who survives? America"