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Joke of the Day

"My report card always said I was not living up to my full potential. Well, the joke's on them. That really was as good as I was going to get"

"How did the tugboat get AIDS? It was rear-ended by a ferry."

"No matter how good your raspberry body wash smells, don't be tempted to drizzle it over your ice cream. I've been burping bubbles for days."

"Why did the dinner roll spend his afternoon knocking on doors? He was a Jehovah's Wheatness"

"why do they put gates around a graveyard? Because people are dying to get in"

"We saw a Taliban bukkake film the other night. It was much the same as a normal porn film, except there was a much bigger explosion over her face at the end."

"The chicken and egg have sex The chicken, enjoying a post coital cigarette, turns to the egg and says ""Well, that answered that old question"""

"If I put a cheddar cheese stick in a pencil sharpener Will it come out sharp or shredded?"

"If this isn't funny, I won't be able to live with myself I'll have to get another apartment."

"Q. What do you call a dead blonde in a closet? A. The 1995 Hide and Seek World Champion."