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Joke of the Day

"The chicken and egg have sex The chicken, enjoying a post coital cigarette, turns to the egg and says ""Well, that answered that old question"""

"Him: Sometimes you can be a little... loud. Me: WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT I AM A DELICATE FLOWER"

"Why did Skrillex's girlfriend dump him? Because he D-D-D-D-DROPPED THE BABY."

"I did my foreign country report on Ethiopia. It was really easy, I didn't even have to bring the class food."

"What do you call a computer smoking weed ? High tech."

"TIL There is a new drug for lesbians dealing with depression. It's called 'trycoxagain'"

"How do you communicate with a fish? You drop him a line."

"Why did the liberal go to the gynecologist? She was feelin' the Bern!"

"I just had a meeting with John It was stressful and hes full of shit."

"Marriage is like a deck of cards. In the beginning all you need is two hearts and a diamond. In the end you wish you had a club and a spade."