18142

Joke of the Day

"Q. What do you call a dead blonde in a closet? A. The 1995 Hide and Seek World Champion."

"Why shouldn't you get stoned and reddit?"

"When does a tree want less? When it's sycamore."

"The only thing more annoying than Libertarians are the people who complain about Libertarians"

"Living on earth may be expensive, but it includes an annual free trip around the sun."

"STDs are like pokemons... To be cool, you gotta catch 'em all."

"I'm so good at sleeping... I can do it with my eyes closed."

"I don't think 'safe sex' sounds like a very good idea. I mean, what if you get locked in and forget the combination"

"The first rule of Thesaurus Club is you do not talk about, name, hint at, refer to, discuss, or mention Thesaurus Club."

"*eats way too much delicious space pudding* Me: Oof I am STUFFED! What'd you call this again? Alien Chef: OH MY GOD YOU ATE MY GRANDMOTHER!"