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Joke of the Day

"Chuck Norris can gargle peanut butter."

"What do you call those things that get fluff off a sweater? Women"

"Why is CoD: Infinite Warfare set in space? because it couldn't survive in the Battlefield."

"I think I want to clean mirrors for a living It's just a job I can see myself doing"

"When you hold me, I'd prefer it not be ""accountable."""

"If Microsoft ever makes a product that doesn't suck... ...it'll be a vacuum!"

"Hey guys I need some help. My assignment's asking how would humans function without their brain. I can't think of anything..."

"Why do seagulls fly over the sea? Because if they flew over the bay they would be called bagels."

"[commercial] [man comes home after long day, opens front door and is attacked by 8 cats] MAN: There has to be a better way! Narrator: DOGS"

"Jesus has been living in my heart for years... ...and I still haven't received one rent check! No wonder they call him king of the Jews..."