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Joke of the Day

"The irony of the gay pride flag is that it clashes with everything."

"I've decided to get help with my drug habit. I've managed to convince some friends to give me bulk discounts."

"What's the difference between PirateBay and 9/11? One is piracy and the other is CONSpiracy"

"Do poodle owners realize they just bought a dog with a shitty 1980s white girl perm?"

"What meal was given out to the survivors of the Chernobyl accident? Fission chips."

"What did the man say when the bass was too loud for his ears? ""That megahertz"" What did the woman get in response when she asked if his ears were okay? 100 watts"

"""Wow, this toilet is really uncomfortable..."" ~Me drunk in the hot tub as my guests throw themselves out"

"How do you find Will Smith in the Snow? I don't know. Just look for the Fresh prints! Ha ha. He's also black."

"Why is the Pharaoh a rare tuba player? Because he Toots Uncommon."

"Noah wasn't much for civilized society . . . You could say he was an-arc-ist."