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Joke of the Day

"I never trust atoms They make up everything."

"I was told politicians didn't take craps I guess that's why they're full of shit"

"Why does salt come in a bottle? Because it's white I don't know why it's funny. I just heard it so can someone explain it to me?"

"After a long day at work, I like to spend time at home with my liquor cabinet oh and my wife I guess and that thing that poops."

"Every spider has the same powers as Spiderman, yet none of them choose to be superheroes. This is everything you need to know about spiders."

"GOd damn millennials with all their browser tabs. The only ""tab"" we used to ""open"" was at the bar, every day, because we had ""alcoholism"""

"What is a vampire's favorite fruit? a Neck-tarine --From a great co-worker"

"There is a new Barbie doll on the market - Marsha Clark Barbie ...with a bad haircut and a bad attitude"

"Donald Trump is banning pre-shredded cheese And making America grate again"

"I'm on Twitter because my brother got a chemistry set for christmas when he was little and I got plaid pants."