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Joke of the Day

"Just been banned from my church's Easter service. Apparently the first words Jesus spoke after emerging from his tomb weren't ""Ta-Daa!"""

"What do you call a heard of masturbating cows? ....Beef stroganoff"

"How do you stop a dog smelling ? Put a peg on it's nose !"

"Are the readers of this subreddit mostly men? Who else would consider a couple inches of text to be long?"

"I'm so grateful to the teacher who defined the word ""plethora"" for me... It meant a lot."

"What did one cloud of fog say to the other? I don't know. It's a Mistery."

"What do fish use to get high Seaweed ;D"

"Never drink water after eating fish !!! Your stomach might become an aquarium. PS not mine read it somewhere"

"Me: What sound do dogs make? 3-year-old: Woof woof. Me: Horses? 3: Neigh. Me: Pigs? 3: Sizzle sizzle. Somebody understands bacon."

"Insert penis joke here. Ha."