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Joke of the Day

"Never drink water after eating fish !!! Your stomach might become an aquarium. PS not mine read it somewhere"

"What did socialists use before candles? Light bulbs."

"Yo mamma so fat... That when she fell, no one was laughing but the ground was cracking up"

"Cop: Lemme see your papers Me: Okay Cop: These are rolling papers Me: Would you look at that Cop: Sir are you high? Me: What are you, a cop?"

"My girlfriend laughed at me when I said I was going to build a car out of spaghetti. You should have seen her face as I drove pasta."

"So a politician dies... Ha!"

"Not only is today Leap Day, but it's also the 52nd anniversary of Family Circus first appearing in newspapers Wow, that's amazing. Just think about it. That's the same joke told 19,028 different ways"

"*Goes fishing *Catches Spongebob *Hangs him on my wall as a trophy *Too lazy to buy a sponge *Uses Spongebob to clean toilet"

"The major difference between death and taxes is that Congress can't make death any worse than it is."

"Cathy on FB is ""feeling annoyed"" and is asking why people even own cell phones if they're not gonna answer. Can I tell her? Pleeease."