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Joke of the Day
"[test driving car with car salesman] *parks on make out hill*"
Next Joke
"What if the Government invented cheese to distract us from reality? *gets arrested*"
"Gandalf chuckled to himself as the boat left shore. ""I just noticed,"" he whispered, ""your name sounds like Dildo"" #LastLinesFromGreatBooks"
"Every time Beyonce types out her name, she has to google ""Pokemon"" and then copy/paste the ""e""."
"Linguistic studies have shown results about drivers of east asian cars... It is proven that a large number of Hyundai owners have an accent."
"Why did the scarecrow win so many awards? Because he was out standing in his field."
"What do you get if you cross the Lone Ranger with an insect ? The Masked-quito !"
"What's E.T short for? Because he's got little legs. But seriously, what does ET stand for? Because he can't sit down."
"Mind: Does a flying dream sound good tonight? Me: Yea! Mind: Horrific shadow demon it is. Me: But I thought-? Mind: Don't worry, it can fly."
"The greatest thing about Christmas is how it teaches kids to be selfish little shits on someone else's birthday."