49779

Joke of the Day

"What do baby swans dance to ? Cygnet-ure-tunes !"

"You always hear about alpha males and beta males, but I'd prefer to be a gamma male They have a higher rate of penetration..."

"If you spin an Asian person around, what do they become? Disoriented."

"[having sex] Her: HARDER! ME: Divide 110 into two parts so that one will be 150% of the other. What are the 2 numbers? Her: 44&66 HARDER!"

"How many feminists does it take to screw in a light bulb? One. She holds it up to the socket and waits for the world to revolve around her."

"Wine and cheese pair well together bc they are both the expired byproducts of other foods enjoy your trash snack rich people"

"What do you call the guy that graduated last in his class at med school? Doctor."

"I like when videogames limit how many things you can hold. ""You have 100 items in an invisible bag. Carrying another would be unrealistic"""

"I got arrested today for masturbating in public My lawyer then told me that we'd beat this together."

"The only thing worse than a cold toilet seat is a warm one"