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Joke of the Day

"Please don't ruin Breaking Bad for me... I'm only at the part where A texts Aria, Spencer, Hanna and Emily"

"What do gay zombies say? Heeeeyyyyrrrrrrraaarrrrrgggggg."

"I'm trying to do unto others as I would have done to me, but they're all ""stop thrusting at me, this is a church service; please sit down"""

"I haven't swam competitively since I was a sperm."

"What does a blonde say after having sex? ""Are you all on the same team?"""

"Noah was the only man notified before Chuck Norris relieved himself in the Atlantic Ocean."

"What is your favorite ""There are two kinds of people..."" joke? My favorite is ""There are two kinds of people...those who cheat at 7-up, and god damned liars."""

"My girlfriends father is very religious and says we can't sleep together. Which is really unfortunate because he is extremely good looking."

"Nothing spoils the target more than a hit."

"Whats the difference between a cat and a comma? One has claws at the end of its paws and one is a pause at the end of a clause."