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Joke of the Day

"To single moms... To single moms, I feel like the saying ""easy come easy go"" has an entirely different meaning."

"Why is a psychiatrist like a squirrel? Because they are both surrounded by nuts."

"A child molester, a conman and a priest walks into a bar He then sat down."

"What do you call a muslim on an airplane? A passenger you racist fuck."

"""Owen, you must hide this baby, at all costs, from Anakin Skywalker."" ""Okay. Should we continue to call him Luke Skywalker?"" ""Seems fine."""

"1+1=3 It does take about 9 months though"

"Did you hear Jurassic World got shut down? Apparently they found a crisp rat in the kitchen!"

"What do Lifesavers do that a man can't? Come in eight flavors."

"How many talking heads does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Two. One to hold the bulb, and another to spin the story until the bulb fits."

"I accidentally took 1 of my girlfriend's multivitamins for women & I've been looking at engagement rings & crying uncontrollably for 4 hours"