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Joke of the Day

"I was gonna make a joke about hitting the gym ...maybe tomorrow"

"What was Roe v. Wade really about? The fastest way to get across a river."

"Pickup line Hey there, wanna come over and watch porn on my 50 inch flat-screen mirror?"

"What was the first treacherous thing said? Adam you gotta try this!"

"One thing's for sure: People who don't know the difference between ""Your"" and ""You're"" and ""To"" and ""Too"" have strong opinions on Facebook."

"ME: Have you seen my denim jacket? GF: No, but it's okay. Just checked the weather & it's not going to be the 1980s today..."

"Friend- ""You're drunk."" Me- *mocking voice* ""You're drunk."" Friend- ""Stop."" Me- *morphs into clone of friend* ""Stop."""

"Where does Crazy Horse live? In an unstable."

"Doctor Doctor I think I'm a moth Get out of the way your in my light!"

"An evil villain is on the loose Ant-Man: Yellowjacket again? [giant kid with magnifying glass emerges] Ant-Man: You gotta be kidding me"