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Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between Kim Kardashian and the Titanic? Ones full of dead semen and the other one is the Titanic"

"How do you help a woman going through menopause You hit menoplay"

"Why is steam such a hipster? Because it was water before it was cool."

"A Nazi scientist walks into Burger King He asks for a Whopper, and the guy at the counter replies: ""Don't you mean a *Heisenburger*?"""

"Where do you get a dog license? At the DMV (Department of Mutt Verification)"

"Aliens scoop me up & put me in a big glass jar w holes poked in the lid. They scatter Pringles inside to simulate my natural environment."

"How many students does it take to change a light bulb? None. Light bulb changing isn't in the course notes."

"Q: There is a frog driving east and a trombonist walking west. What can be surmised from this? A: The frog's probably on its way to a gig."

"""What the fuck is a newspaper?"" - our grandchildren"

"[OC] Gurl, do you want a pinworm infection? Cuz id like to stick something 1/4 of an inch and thin inside of your anus."