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Joke of the Day

"My sex life is just like Star Wars It's either Han Solo, or I have to use force."

"The older I get, the more I feel like the town elders in Footloose were actually pretty cool."

"I went to one of those colleges where you can make up your own degree... I ended up with a major in paedophilia and a minor in the back of my van."

"I poked my eye out .("

"What would I do?"

"My nephew asked, 'Do you have a New Years hangover today?' I said, 'No. Hangovers are for people who stop drinking'."

"Oh, you're a lesbian? You're not attracted to men, so you go date girls that look like men. That makes complete sense."

"How come there are no Olympics in Mexico? Because all of the Mexicans that can run jump and swim are already in America."

"Why are oranges like bells? You can peel (peal) both of them."

"Why did the Dino Dance Team fail the Talent Show? They were all Nervous-Rex"