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Joke of the Day
"Where do Chicago football fans buy engagement rings? De Beers"
Next Joke
"wife: it looks too tight me: it's fine, let's just go [ten minutes later paramedics have to cut my turtleneck off after I pass out]"
"Your mama is so dirty Her crabs have dirt bike races."
"What starts and ends with a 'v' and is only one letter? 'w'"
"What's the difference between black people and cancer? Cancer got Jobs."
"I can cut down a tree just by looking at it It's true, I saw it with my own eyes"
"When I was younger, I was kicked out of the Boy Scouts I ate a Brownie."
"Mom: Hey honey who are you talking too? Me: My girlfriend. Mom: Don't lie to me you fatass! You're ordering pizza aren't you? Me: ( ._. )"
"Nothing is certain but death and iTunes updates."
"Why is ten afraid of nine? Because nine ate seven! *heh heh*"