48755

Joke of the Day

"I aint racist! I LOVE NASCAR!"

"I'm going to the gym now. Not bragging. Just want you to know where to send the ambulance."

"Chasing away everyone who's ever tried to get close to you is a great way to save money on Christmas shopping."

"What's the highest thing in existence? A female's issues. They won't ever be able to get over them."

"Grand Theft Auto 6 just announced. Already criticized for displaying ""excessive and gratuitous violence towards pedestrians"". Apparently your character is just a normal on-duty cop."

"What do Australian chess players say when they're finished eating at a restaurant? Check mate."

"Premature ejaculators are like Christians They are all waiting for resurrection and second coming."

"does the voice recognition on your phone work i don't know im trying to submit a post on reddit please stop talking you're messing me up"

"[911 call] IM GETTING EATEN- *pause* Ok one sec. *holds phone away from mouth* Are you an alligator or a crocodile? *pause* Cool. ITS A CRO-"

"Why are birthday's good for you? Statistics show that the people who have the most live the longest!"