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Joke of the Day

"whats brown and sticky? a stick!"

"Instead of an accountant, hire a philosopher to do your taxes. It's the thought that counts."

"Dear Dreamworks, How to Train Your Dragon was not the instructional movie I was hoping for since acquiring a Komodo dragon"

"What do you call 2 horses side by side in a stable? Neigh-bours."

"I was playing Battleship with my tumor... I won though, my last hit was B9."

"I don't understand the purpose of smooth objects. I mean, there's no point."

"I wish prostitutes would learn a lesson from eBay ...and do away with insertion fees."

"How to survive a beat attack Run faster than your wife and kids"

"What is the definition of a Wife? An attachment you screw on the bed to get the housework done."

"If you ever catch me staring blankly during our conversation it's because I can't remember if it's my turn to say words or yours."