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Joke of the Day

"What happens when a question mark and an exclamation mark love each other very much? They [interrobang!](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Interrobang)"

"If I stop my car so you can walk across the street, I better see some hustle out of you! Knees to chest damnit! KNEES TO CHEST"

"Why couldn't the whistleblower step outside? Because it's Snowden."

"What do you call a penis and a potato on a boats? A dictatorship!"

"My boss always gets angry at me when we golf together, for some reason. All I do is compliment him on his subpar golfing skills"

"What has 9 arms, 7 legs, 4 heads, and 13 feet? The finish line of the Boston Marathon."

"My cat deleted my final thesis. Don't believe me? Cats can handle mice."

"Why are things sent by car called shipments, and things sent by ships called cargo?"

"Her lips said no, but her eyes said... read my lips"

"Always wash your clothes in tide Because it's way too cold out-tide"