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Joke of the Day

"If our last names came from the jobs of our ancestors... Then I feel really bad for the boys of the ""Dickinson"" family tree."

"I came across the most beautiful girl i've ever seen today at the supermarket.. She wasn't the least bit happy, even after I offered to clean it all up and buy her a new top.."

"How many kids with ADD does it take to change a light bulb? Wanna go ride bikes? My all time favorite joke. Sorry if it has already been posted but who has the time to browse all of r/jokes."

"CLERK: $3.74 ME: *reaches in pocket & pulls out whole ham* sorry I have cash *reaches back in & pulls out 2nd ham* well this is embarrassing"

"I turned my phone on ""Airplane Mode"" and threw it into the air. Worst transformer ever."

"How do Mongolians practice safe sex? They use a khandom."

"Caspar: I was the teacher's pet last year. Jaspar: Why was that? Caspar: She couldn't afford a dog."

"This could be the beginning of a beautiful restraining order."

"The Artist I just saw a group of people who were watching an artist sketch all of them in his book. The man was good too, he really knew how to draw a crowd."

"*[At the dinner table]* ""No grandma, those aren't knitting needles. We're having Chinese food"""