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Joke of the Day

"Caspar: I was the teacher's pet last year. Jaspar: Why was that? Caspar: She couldn't afford a dog."

"Why do optometrists enjoy nautical jokes? They have a good sense of aqueous humor."

"What's red, 6 inches long, and makes my girlfriend cry when I feed it to her? Her miscarriage"

"I call my genitalia the Severance Package... After its seen it usually ends relationships."

"the united states russia argentina and germany walk into a bar...... germany turns to argentina and says ""hey wanna go into the country with me"" HAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAH get it?"

"Whenever I write out my alimony payment, I put cute things on the memo. Like ""for your next divorce"" or ""clothes that make you feel skinny""."

"Did you know it's now politically incorrect to say 'black paint'? Now you have to say ""Jamaal can you please paint the fence""."

"Why do volleyball player want to join the armed forces? For the chance to gain some experience in the service."

"Being a father is the single greatest feeling on earth. Not including those wonderful years I spent without a child, of course."

"My Nissan uncomfortably seats 7 if any group of people wants to take an intimate road trip"