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Joke of the Day

"In a recent court case, the defendant was charged with smuggling bombs inside of living cows... ...Upon hearing this, one of the jurors cried out, ""Abominable!"" (A bomb in a bull)"

"Ocean's 45: The group gets bigger each heist It's too hard to keep secrets Someone posts the next plan on Facebook Everyone goes to jail"

"Tornadoes and marriage are alike, because they both begin with a lot of sucking and blowing, and in the end you lose your house."

"Very few things upset my wife. So, it makes me feel rather special to be one of them."

"So a crazy dog goes to a place where dogs get scanned by a machine and the dog goes crazy and breaks it and everyone is scared. He's inSCANINE!"

"Why don't they let Italians swim in Long Island Sound? If you know that one, try this one: Why do seagulls fly to the dump?"

"Another Halloween joke. A skeleton walks into a bar... He orders a beer, and a mop."

"My wife and I were happy for 24 years. Then we met."

"What do you get when you cross a whore and a leprechaun. A little green fucker about two feet tall. (Best told orally so can hold hands two feet apart.)"

"How do you reward a chicken journalist? With a poulette surprise!"