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Joke of the Day
"Yo Momma is so ugly that she scares blind people!!!!"
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"""You're stepping on all the cracks, but you don't have to worry about it because your mother's dead"" - my seven-year-old to me this morning"
"NASA : we were wrong , there ARE 9 planets in the Solar System PLUTO: I'm back, baby! NASA: because we found a new one! PLUTO: SON OF A"
"What does the quantum duck say? Quark Quark"
"""911? Help, my house is burning down!"" ""Sir, we're sending the fire brigade right now."" ""I HAVE ENOUGH FIRE I DON'T NEED A BRIGADE OF IT."""
"An Irishman, a Scot and an Englishman walk into a pub... They each enjoyed a pint and shared some laughs. It was a great night."
"Finding a girlfriend is a lot like fishing... There are plenty of fish in the sea, but it's just you holding your rod until you catch one."
"What do ISIS and Little Miss Muffett have in common? They both have curds in their whey!"
"What is a hurricane's favorite pet? -Anywhere from 1 to 5 cats"
"I asked a German girl for her number today. Apparently it is 999-999-9999. Weird right?"