48052

Joke of the Day

"A young lady who had just been dumped by her boyfriend seemed unusually cheerful. Someone asked her why, and she replied that, sooner or later, time wounds all heels."

Next Joke
 
"[7:30pm] Tonight I'll actually go to bed on time and get sleep! [2:30am] the most money ever paid for a cow at an auction was $1.3 million"
"If Petrus were to get a tattoo... ...would it be called lithography?"
"Rig Sour punch straw contest http://flavors.sourpunch.com that is the link. Make a Kiwi Flavor with Super Sour topping Named Hobae"
"This morning I was in my car doing donuts in the parking lot at work Now I have glaze all over my balls."
"What did the hamburger name his daughter? Patty."
"Where do modern-day pirates come from? Somaaaaaarlia"
"What's the fastest thing in Bulgaria? Light"
"St. Patrick's Day may just be an excuse to drink, but then again so is Ireland."
"*sits 27 hours for an oil on canvas portrait* omg delete that. Bartholomew i'm serious do not fucking hang that in the Great Hall"