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Joke of the Day

"Struggling with Christmas Presents??? If you're struggling to think of what to get someone for Christmas... Get them a fridge and watch their face light up when they open it!"

"A philosopher asked, ""what's worse, ignorance or apathy?"" The pupil replied, "" I don't know, and I don't care!"""

"My buddy told me he was having sex with twins... I asked how do you tell them apart? He said, ""Her brother has a mustache"""

"What do Popeye's fingers smell like? Olive oil."

"Man, you see that clown who's been spending all day hiding from faggots? No, havn't seen him? Interesting.."

"Dogs can't operate an MRI machine but... Catscan."

"So, I was at work the other day and... My manager asked, ""How good are you at PowerPoint?"" I said, ""I Excel at it."" He replied, ""Was that a Microsoft Office pun?"" I was like, ""Word."""

"""Ice, Ice, Baby, Vanilla, Ice, Ice, Baby."" - Worst cocktail recipe ever"

"How many dead hookers do you need to replace a lightbulb? Atleast not three since my basement is still dark."

"What do you get if you cross an eagle with a skunk? A bird that stinks to high heaven."