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Joke of the Day
"Roses are red, here's something new... Violets are violet. Not fucking blue."
Next Joke
"The Woods So a guy is walking with a young boy into the woods. Boy ""Hey mister its getting dark out and I'm scared,"" Man ""How do you think I feel, I have to walk back alone."""
"My doctor told me to eat more Taco Bell. Well actually he said ""less McDonald's"" but I'm pretty sure I know what he meant"
"After failing my first 2 exams, I just got an A on my third Anatomy exam... the answers were inside me the entire time"
"What was the most successful love story in Game of Thrones? Shireen. She was only on Tinder for a couple of minutes."
"An Irishman walks out of a bar... It could happen"
"Why couldn't the Chinese herpetologist see out his car window? Because it was too froggy outside."
"Dentist: This is gonna hurt a little. Me: Ok. Dentist: I've been sleeping with your mom."
"Turning 40 When my best friend turned 40, I sent him a CD in the mail: UB40. 2 months later, on my 40th, I received a CD in the mail from him: U2."
"What do you call Bruno Mars? Michael Jackson the third."