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Joke of the Day

"Why do people assume I know all about computers just because I'm from India? That makes so I angry I just want to 01010010101010101010101"

"All this talk about Trump hating immigrants... Yet he married two of them."

"A redneck broke up with his girlfriend it wasn't all that bad, she said they could still be cousins."

"Did a somersault for the first time in years. I know that's not a good tweet but I'm getting bored lying here waiting for the paramedics."

"""I could stay awake just to hear you breathing...Watch you smile while you're sleeping..."" Aerosmith = Romantic Me = Restraining Order"

"Why do they use sterilized needles for death by lethal injection?"

"Help is a magic word. Say it to people & watch them disappearing from the horizon of your life."

"One morning, the CEO of an airline company asked his chief procurement officer: -- So, what's the deal with airline food?"

"What do you call something that protects your fucking cock during sex? A condom"

"How many feminists does it take to screw a lightbulb? One to screw it in and nine to write on their blogs about how enlightening the experiment was."