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Joke of the Day
"Sheryl Sandberg's husband died while exercising on a treadmill. He was trying to get his Lean In."
Next Joke
"Whenever we eat hummus my girlfriend always says to me.... HUMMUS IS YUMMUS!!!!!"
"Chuck Norris has a roundhouse-kick app for his iPhone 8.0"
"What's the difference between two dicks and a joke? Your mom can't take a joke"
"Autocorrect just changed ""I have so much anxiety I can barely breathe"" to ""I'm fine."""
"Death is a part of life... Specifically the last part."
"Ever think about an old friend and wonder what they're doing right now? They're playing on their phone. Everyone is playing on their phone."
"What's the NSA's favourite game? I spy."
"Spent over an Hour at the wife's grave this Morning Bless her, She thinks I'm Digging a Pond."
"Son, I found some drugs in your backpack ""Dad I swear they're not mine"" DAMMIT SUSAN, THEY ARENT HIS. 1st time we were proud and you blew it"