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Joke of the Day

"Why didn't the patient sue the dentist for pulling the wrong tooth? Because it was accidental."

"Einstein married his cousin Esla Even his marriage was relative."

"Ever heard of the 68 position? You go down on me now and I'll owe you one."

"Putting a woman on a $10 makes sense . . . . . . no one really wants a 1 or a 5. (As heard on Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me)"

"Just once in my life... ...I'd like to get up in the morning and be as excited about it as my dick is."

"My sister bet me $100 I couldn't build a car out of spaghetti You should have seen her face when I drove pasta."

"Girl, do you have 67 protons? Cuz you a Ho"

"I lasted 1 hour and 30 seconds while having sex last night... Thank you daylight savings!"

"A magnet walked into a bar. It stuck."

"I had no idea time zones were so far apart...Just landed in China and it's fucking New Year apparently."