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Joke of the Day

"I lasted 1 hour and 30 seconds while having sex last night... Thank you daylight savings!"

"I used to have black friends until my dad sold them :("

"What do you call a British woman with a yeast infection? An English muffin"

"I think Bran might actually know how to walk and is just faking it. He's always lying."

"I just fell backwards off a stool trying to get the last few crumbs from a Pringles can into my mouth if anyone needs a wife or something."

"I'm going to by a bunch of those stick figure decals and randomly ad family members to the windows of unattended vehicles."

"2 men are in the bathroom. One is seen running in, the other leaving. What are their nationalities? Russian and Finnish!"

"Why did the thoughtful father buy his six children a dachshund? He wanted a dog they could all pet at once."

"What's the difference between Donald Trump and Adolf Hitler? Well, one is a racist, megalomaniacal, rabble-rousing buffoon and the other one is Adolf Hitler."

"I just sprayed a mosquito... with mosquito repellent. Now he'll never have any friends."