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Joke of the Day

"Have you heard men get hit by lightning 6x more often than women? The kitchen must be a very safe place"

"Unemployed people I have some jokes about the unemployed. Actually it doesn't matter none of them work Edit: I do not mean to cause any offence to the unemployed it is merely meant as a joke."

"Her: *smiles* You fill those out very nicely. Me: (looks at jeans)Thanks. Bank Teller: Sir, could you please pass back the forms? Me: Ohh!"

"Q: How many Leos does it take to change a lightbulb? A: None: Leos are so enthusiastic they carry their own light."

"The real heroes are the people who don't call back when you accidentally call them and only let it ring once."

"What's the good word? Legs. Spread the word!"

"How many cashiers does it take to change a light bulb? ""Are you kidding? They won't even change a five dollar bill."""

"I knew this neighborhood was classy enough for me when I saw there is a ""Pregnant Only"" parking spot in front of the Liquor store."

"""Endless shrimp"" sounds nice until you realize they are serious. It's a threat. The shrimp will never stop."

"""One of my neighbours had half of his large intestine removed,"" I said to my mate. ""Did he end up in a coma?"" He asked. ""No,"" I replied, ""But he did end up with a semi-colon."""